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Saturday, March 15, 2008


Dear Bloggie,

I can't sleep.
If this were a journal (with paper) it'd probably be all tear stained. I feel so pathetic right now. So overwhelmed.
Colleges, choosing a career, applying for post secondary (what if i actually get in? How the hell am I supposed to find my way around? Or drive there? if I ever learn that is. And what if I don't get in? I cant afford a full college. Let alone all the added years I'll need in trying to find a career. What if I fail at it? Not enough money, theres definitely a shortage), this presentation I have. I hate speaking if front of people. I usually speak to softy, so then I have to repeat my presentation. And Sometimes I start to tear up (I'm scared out of my mind when I have to speak in front of a group) and then I'll get so embarrassed I wont be able to stop. And it will just keep coming and coming. Then I'll be even more terrified! And what topic? I chose a partner to try and ease the embarrassment but all she wants to do is a presentation on Stoffer's macaroni! How embarrassing! It doesn't even match the class!!! Urg not to mention my crush will be watching me!

I wish none of this was real, that life wasn't really so complicated. That I could just close my eyes and when I open them again this will have all been a dream.

My heart feels heavy.
With love♥,
Duzzie.
23:02
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